Saturday, December 24, 2016

Sometimes you win & Sometimes you learn

     2016 has been a wild ride. Last New Year's Eve I went to the best sushi dinner with my friends. Zilla was serving a sake blend to cleanse us of our demons from 2015. Little did we know that some bigger demons were waiting right around the corner. This year I have loved and learned and lost and laughed more than I could have imagined. I traveled, ate delicious food, started a job that felt like coming home, strengthened friendships & learned that sometimes the best thing to do is to let go. Amidst all of the chaos of 2016 on a personal, national, and global level, I learned that friendship is one of the most important resources. As much as I want to be strong and independent, I can't do everything on my own. That's life; it's a give and take. 
      Having friends you can text at three am because they also have insomnia, friends that know you will never turn down pizza even though it gives you a stomach ache, friends that make you laugh until it feels like your abs will split down the middle, friends who will run through the airport with you because there is no way you are missing out on New Orleans, friends you can call when you are crying too hard to be coherent, friends that are so proud of you and never let you forget how wonderful you are. "A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

     As my world started to take a turn for the better, it seemed like the whole world was falling apart. I am working to be better at standing up for what I believe in and speaking out against things that are wrong. I am pushing myself to become educated about the things that scare me and to take action however I can. I want to start volunteering for a social justice organization in 2017 and would love any suggestions. 

     If I learned anything from 2016, it is the importance of support. It might come from friends, coworkers, family, self-care, or therapy. If you are incredibly lucky, it might come from all of these. I've been working with my counselor (three cheers for mental healthcare!) on ways to manage my anxiety. Rather than letting myself get spun out of control when my anxious thoughts try to take over, I'm working to respond to them in a positive way. I deserve the love and respect I so freely give to others. When I feel my anxiety rising up, I speak to it the way I would speak to one of my kindergarteners. "Hey sweetie, I see that you are really upset. Let's start by taking a deep breath. Right now we are in the middle of something else, but I promise we will come back to this at a better time."
     I know many of us are approaching 2017 with fear and uncertainty. All that we can do is show up and bring with us all of the lessons we have learned this year and fight to make the world a better place than we found it.


  1. I stumbled across your blog tonight. After reading it I have to tell you something I tell my third graders. Don't ever forget how amazing you are and don't let any ever tell you otherwise.